|Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn|
You know who else has no problem bragging about this neighborhood? Realtors! And just because I'm curious, I sometimes do a quick scan online of some of the buildings I pass by to see if I can learn anything about the apartments whose souls I ignominiously snatch with my camera.
Because I can't afford to do anything with a Brooklyn apartment apart from, say, replacing my mailbox key, I sometimes get caught up with other aspects of real estate, like marveling at the hyperbolic writing and strange verbal contortions found on realtor's websites. Call me a simpleton, but I liked this building from a quick gander at the cool red door and brickwork, but did you know that this place boasts "a rec room large enough to house a california king"? Or that there's an "intimate front yard, replete with tree and garden gnome"?
Now whether you think "intimate" is the adjective you want duct-taped to your "yard" is a personal matter. But imagine my sadness when I learned that this co-op with its "most valued vestage of American Living: YOUR OWN HUGE GARAGE" was already sold, thereby banishing me to the cruel sidewalks once again. Oh Brooklyn I love you, but you're bringing me down.